alala alala

They´re just words, but they´re words that keep me company. And now they´re gone. Both his and his. I feel lonely without those words. I feel loved when I hear his words, and I feel happy when I read his, and without them I feel bored, and left to my own devices. I´m not sure I´m all that good at being alone. I always did, but now I´m wordless and I´m binging. Maybe not on food, like most people, but I´m binging on checking my email, my myspace, longing for their words, any one of them. I pretty much spend the whole day in waiting. Whatever I do, it´s just something to kill time until their words come. But today, none of them did. And so I keep on binging, this time watching other people live their lives, for hours, hoping to escape mine. Because I don´t know what to do with it, until I have those words.

I am addicted to words, to all of them, but their words have an even stronger effect on me. Other words entertain me, but if they´re not readily available sometime I can move on and look for something else to do. But their words really got me by the balls. If I don´t have their words, that´s it for me. Or at least for my day. I´ll probably not end up doing anything worth nothing until I get those words. Can you go cold turkey because of words? I can. And why is it words for me, and not people? Sure, the words belong to these people, but I´m never in a relationship with the whole person, it´s always just me and their words.